giving up on good: the one where I ask my husband

Is it Thursday already?

Despite the fact that I have accomplished so little this week, yes, it is already Thursday, and that means it’s time for Giving Up On Good. Have you joined in this encouraging link up yet? It’s pretty fantastic–women learning and sharing how they discern the good from the great and foster what really brings life. Some things, some good things, we just have to let go of, at least for a season.

A couple of weeks ago, I shared about being more intentional with this practice, so I took a big step in that direction this past week. I asked my husband what he thought. I gave it to him like this: I stay at home most days with our baby, and I have a finite amount of energy and time. I can focus on keeping the house up better (which is unbelievably difficult for me) or I can focus on having dinner ready most nights. Both good, good things that I would love to accomplish. But based on how my days go, I know that at this specific point in my life, I am not doing both well, so I asked my husband which would add more life to his days.

I was surprised when he said, “I don’t care if you cook dinner. I couldn’t expect you to do that when I get home at a different time everyday.”

I was surprised not because of my husband’s kindness (he’s always kind) but because I had made a huge assumption. I had assumed that a “real” dinner (i.e., not another tuna sandwich) was important to him for a number of reasons, all of which turned out to be not-so-important after all.

So I’m giving up on the idea that I should get a protein and two vegetables on the table every night. And I’m relinquishing the guilt when we eat another tuna sandwich in the living room while getting the baby ready for bed. I do hope when that little girl is old enough we can form a more routine family dinner practice, but right now it’s an unnecessary good for us.

I’m curious–how have you included your family in your giving up on good choices? Is there something you’re doing because you assume it’s important to someone else?

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2 thoughts on “giving up on good: the one where I ask my husband

  1. Great question to ask your husband, and great answer. I think we often expect more from ourselves than they expect from us. And what is important to them is often not what we’d think. I’m betting he’d much rather hang with you. That is the important thing.=) Have a wonderful day!

  2. It’s funny how much we learn when we just ask! It’s a relief to realize our families don’t need us to do everything. You’re right–that pressure is usually coming from ourselves.

    Thanks so much for your input!

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