First Mama’s Day

 

Sunday was sweet. It was my first Mother’s Day, and I got to spend it with my mom, both my grandmothers, and my mother-in-law (and the rest of the family). Most happily, it was also Caroline’s dedication day at church. We made a public proclamation of our intent to turn our parenting of her over to God, a commitment to lead her the best we can to make her own commitment to God when the time comes. Our pastor groups baby dedications together with baptisms and weddings–public events that represent personal, internal commitments. I want to think of it that way–as a commitment that I cannot go back on, as a public moment that I can remember to spur on that commitment. The truth is I had already turned it all over to God–her sweet little life, every moment of my parenting, our journey as a family–because I realized in the first weeks of motherhood that I could not function without God’s strength in this.  There are times I have been tempted to go my own way with things, but this was not one of those times. It was just so clear to me that it wouldn’t work. There will come a day when I foolishly rely on my own wisdom in parenting–I’m sure of that–but God has used the difficulties of these first weeks to start me out humbled at his feet, and I hope that’s where I can abide.

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